Carrying

We performed fourteen times in less than two weeks. Truth heaped upon truth, revealing itself little by little to the stubborn heart that I own. And I heard this song every single time, and every time I had to be reminded.

I am carried.

It was mentioned at the beginning of the year, during our first module course, that the only thing that we contribute to our salvation is our sin.

Think about it.

The only thing we bring is our inadequacy, our brokenness, our inability.

And in our shattered state, He lifts and carries us to that banquet that He's promised.

On the road with tour, it was so easy to slip into letting those prayer times before performances being the only times that I purposely talked to Him. To let the message that we were sharing be the time I spent with Him instead of letting that message flow from a heart that was resting in Him.

I tried to do it all by myself. As if I was trying to be something that I wasn't, trying to conjure up something that didn't exist.

I was stumbling, crawling desperately up that hill when there were Arms ready to hold me if I just stopped so desperately trying to do it on my own.

And it was when I simply talked to Him, told Him everything, invited Him into the everyday moments, acknowledged the way that He wasn't the middle of everything like He should be that I realized, once again, that in the every day, I need to be carried.

Over the last month or so, I have  been reading through Psalms and Proverbs and He has really been underlining his unfailing love.

Return, O LORD, and rescue me. Save me because of your unfailing love. (Psalm 6:4)

But I trust in your unfailing love. I will rejoice because you have rescued me. I will sing because the LORD is good to me. (Psalm 13:5-6)

I cried out, "I am slipping!" but your unfailing love, O LORD, supported me. When doubts filled my mind, your comfort gave me renewed hope and cheer. (Psalm 94:18-19)

Not to us, O LORD, not to us, but to your name goes all the glory for your unfailing love and faithfulness. (Psalm 115:1)

And it's everywhere. There are many, many more references.

His unfailing love, His carrying, that's why I can keep going on. Because it's not about me. That moment when our walk began? That was when I first allowed Him to carry me and said, "I cannot do this." And the everyday requires repeating that same surrendering of will, that same laying down of self.

It's only when He carries me that I find that He is strong because I am weak.

He longs to carry you. Will you let Him?