Pleasure

I opened up the book yesterday, and turned to my chapter. The title hit me hard - Planned for God's Pleasure. I struggle with this... a lot, in both simple and complex ways. Simple, because I find it hard to take my eyes off of me and what I want to do, and complex, because... I can't understand that kind of love.

To think that He smiled at my birth.. that He made me the way I am because He simply wanted to. It blows my mind! Too often I see myself as normal... which, in and of itself, isn't that bad. I shouldn't think too highly of myself, and yet to give myself the proper place to which He has assigned me... as His personal pleasure... is a huge balance beam. But, here again, comes in the fact that it's not about me, but Him.

If I simply live my life, working to please Him, in every way I can. To offer my life as a worship of who and what He is. That is my goal... my ultimate aim.

Leaving my devotions, I felt refreshed and new. I felt like I had discovered an oasis. That same day, the lessons I had learned earlier that morning came into play. We were strolling through Ikea.. through that endless serpentine maze of bedrooms, kitchens, dining rooms, bathrooms, and everything else that could make you drool, when I realized that I was doing just that. Drooling... The pleasure that the world offers, the shiny new things, the attention they bring, the space that the craving for new things creates...all leave me empty. It's as if this world is a desert, and these mirages are luring me from the real thing.. the real oasis.

I wonder what the balance is. The difference between having new things and pleasing Him. But for right now, I strive to give Him pleasure, while not falling for the world's.